Opinions of Others
“What other people think of me is none of my business” – I’d heard this at a seminar once and felt it was a profound statement.. but I’m not sure I really ‘got it’. The reason I’m writing about this topic is because I’ve felt like I haven’t been real for a loong time. Maybe there were parts of me that were my true essence and then other parts that I acquired that weren’t really me. I tried those bits on and kept some- thinking I needed to – in order to be deemed ‘acceptable’ in certain circles.
Looking back I think the opinions of others about who I am or what I’m capable of Has impacted the way I showed up. I thought I had to be seen or heard in a particular way because of what they <<insert people in your life whose opinions you have listened to time and time again>> said.
Why is this so timely? Because I had a major download (from the Man above I’d like to say) about what was standing in my way from being all that I am. It hit me – not like a ton of bricks but as a quiet self assured voice saying I was seeking acceptance and approval from others – and this was holding me back. I was looking at my ‘five year old’ – the pic in one of my blog posts and one thing that I knew she was seeking was love and approval – this may have been from my parents. As I grew older I think I looked for approval from my friends, teachers and perhaps even strangers who are probably of no consequence to me. So the result? A very watered down version of me. I tried to be all things to all people and frankly that’s been really really tiring. And you know what? I’m sick of it : ) I say that with a smile because it’s such a relief to realise that and finally let it go! I’m soo done with that now.
I’d like to ask you a question: How has someone’s opinion of you kept you hostage? You were too afraid to say what you wanted to say because you didn’t believe it would be ‘acceptable’ or that what you had to share was contrary to what everyone else believed. As I write this I just got another little juicy nugget from the ether- that it’s absolutely freeing to have ideas and insights that aren’t the norm – because it makes you unique and special -and after all there’s only You – everybody else is taken right?
I wanted to just share what I believe is true for me at this point in my life. People are going to share with you their opinions about you or how you should and should not behave or be. They always will. They’ll do so from their own models of the world – their own rose tinted glasses or whatever colour of the rainbow you choose to take it through.
I’ve decided to take my masks off – and I’m asking you to join me - when you’re ready of course : )
The learning that I will be taking with me moving forward, is that in the end, you are the ultimate authority on what makes sense and what doesn’t make sense to you – the parts you’d like to take on board and the parts that you’d like to discard.
Lots of love and hugs xox
Would love to hear about some of the masks you’ve been wearing and perhaps which ones you’re willing to let go of.. so you can see the world afresh – as you.